How Asking 'What Might I Be Missing?' Rewires Your Reactions in One Week

One clarifying question per day. Seven days. A fundamentally different way of seeing people, problems, and yourself.

Welcome to the positive corner of the internet. Every weekday, we help you make sense of the complex world of wellness by analyzing the headlines, simplifying the latest research, and providing quick tips designed to help you stay healthier in under 5 minutes. If you were forwarded this message, you can get the free daily email here.

Today’s Health Upgrade

  • Number you won’t forget

  • A hidden stressor?

  • Weekly wisdom

  • Why doing the right things can still feel wrong

Health
Number You Won’t Forget: 2%
Why Early Weight Loss Progress Predicts Success. And What You Need To Keep It Going

Most people think the most challenging part of losing weight is staying motivated for months.

But a new study suggests your first few weeks might tell you everything you need to know about whether your plan will actually work.

Researchers followed 124 adults with obesity through a 16-week weight-loss program. They wanted to know whether early progress could predict who would lose at least 5% or even 10% of their body weight.

Those who lost more than 2 percent of their weight by week 4 were far more likely to hit greater than 5% weight loss by Week 16. And those who lost more than 3 percent by week 4 had much higher odds of losing more than 10% by week 16.

In other words, losing just 2% to 3% of your body weight in the first month is one of the strongest predictors that you’ll succeed long-term.

But, here’s the part most people miss.

Early momentum is only helpful if you can sustain it. A 2022 meta-analysis found that only 25% of people maintain weight loss long-term after finishing a diet. Not because they lack willpower, but because the approach that helped them lose weight wasn’t built for real life.

That’s why the National Weight Control Registry, which tracks more than 10,000 successful maintainers, is so powerful. It keeps a running record of people who have lost an average of 70 pounds and kept it off for more than 5 years.

The part that sticks out? They don’t do anything crazy, but they do make adjustments that they can maintain.

The majority change their eating habits, exercise more, spend less time watching TV, and eat breakfast daily. But you’ll notice that there is no particular diet or exercise that leads to greater success. It’s more about finding something that helps the scale go in the right direction, that they also won’t hate.

When we help people in the Pump Club app, we focus on a few simple truths, which are backed by these studies:

  1. Your first month is diagnostic and a signal. Losing 2-3% tells you your plan fits your life. If you’re not seeing progress, don’t white-knuckle harder; adjust sooner.

  2. The long game matters most. The people who keep weight off aren’t perfect. They’ve just found routines they can live with.

  3. Behaviors and habits beat extremes and tribal thinking. It’s not keto vs. low-fat. It’s whether you move your body, monitor your patterns, and stay consistent.

Together With DeleteMe 
You Train to Protect Your Body. But Where Else Is Stress Hiding In Your Life?

You work out to stay strong. You eat well to support your heart. You sleep to recover. 

Every healthy habit you build is really about one thing: reducing avoidable risk so you can live with more confidence and less stress.

So we asked ourselves: where else does stress exist that you don’t pay as much attention to? 

Most people don’t realize this, but your personal information — your name, address, phone number, relatives’ names — is collected and sold by hundreds of data brokers. And that information is often the starting point for targeted scams and impersonation attempts.

The FTC recently reported that Americans lost $12.5 billion to fraud and scams last year. Not because people were careless, but because their information made them easier targets.

This isn’t about panic. It’s about awareness. If there’s an easy way to lower your exposure, why not take it?

That’s why we use DeleteMe. Think of it as a personal trainer for your privacy. It does the work you don’t have time for: scanning data broker sites, finding where your personal information is exposed, removing it, and keeping it off as new listings appear.

Their privacy report even shows how many hours of work they saved you. (Spoiler: actually finding every place your information appears takes far more time than you’d ever expect.)

And just like a good coach, DeleteMe brings something even more valuable than results: peace of mind. You get to feel more protected in a digital world that doesn’t always feel that way.

If you want to minimize your risk and remove an avoidable stressor, check out DeleteMe and use code PUMPCLUB for 20% off. Because feeling safer — online or offline — is one more way to support your health.

Weekly Wisdom

Most of the trouble we get into — interpersonally, emotionally, even professionally —starts with one reflex: assuming we already understand.

Judgment is the ego’s shortcut. It feels efficient, but it closes the door to learning, misreads other people’s intentions, and traps us in the same stories we’ve been telling ourselves for years.

Curiosity does the opposite. It slows the moment down just enough to notice the hidden angles: why someone reacted sharply, what fear is underneath your own irritation, what piece of context you never bothered to ask about.

Curiosity isn’t soft. It’s courageous. Because it requires admitting, I don’t know everything yet. And that’s the foundation of growth, understanding, and empathy.

Judgment wants certainty. Curiosity wants truth. And truth always lives one question deeper.

Turn Wisdom Into Action

For the next seven days, run a simple experiment: Every time you feel a snap judgment forming (about yourself or someone else), pause and ask one clarifying question. Here are a few examples:

  • “What might I be missing?”

  • “What else could be true here?”

  • “If I were acting generous instead of defensive, how would I interpret this?”

Track just one moment each day where curiosity changed your reaction. By the end of the week, you’ll notice something subtle but powerful: your world gets bigger, your relationships get easier, and you stop tripping over the same assumptions that used to hold you back.

Curiosity isn’t just a mindset shift; it’s a pattern interrupt that opens new possibilities every time you use it.

Better Questions, Better Solutions 
The Identity Drift
When doing all the “right” things still feels wrong.

Old Question: Why do I feel stuck even when I’m doing the “right” things?
Better Question: What part of my life no longer matches the person I’m becoming?

Sometimes the problem isn’t effort. It’s alignment.

You can improve your habits, tighten your routines, lift heavier, eat better, and still feel strangely stagnant because the rest of your life didn’t update alongside your growth.

Identity drift happens when your behavior evolves, but your environment, commitments, or relationships stay anchored to an older version of you. 

When you ask which part of your life hasn’t caught up, you reveal exactly where momentum is leaking.

Researchers studying motivation and long-term behavior change have found that progress sticks best when your environment matches your identity. In psychology, this is known as self-concordance: the idea that goals aligned with your evolving sense of self lead to greater persistence, enjoyment, and better outcomes.

People whose goals reflected their authentic values showed higher well-being and lower burnout months later than those pursuing goals out of obligation or habit. 

When your inner identity and outer commitments clash — something as simple as a job that no longer fits, a routine that once served you but now restricts you, or friendships built around an older lifestyle — you naturally feel stuck, even if you’re doing everything “right.”

The good news? The moment you identify the mismatch, you can adjust the external world to support the internal one. And often, even one minor adjustment (ending an old commitment, reshaping your schedule, or communicating a new boundary) creates an immediate sense of momentum.

If you’re feeling stuck, pick one area of your life to examine with the new question:  “What part of this no longer matches who I’m becoming?”

Choose from four high-impact places where identity drift tends to hide:

Your commitments (obligations you outgrew)
Your environment (spaces that shape old habits)
Your relationships (people who anchor you to past versions of yourself)
Your routines (behaviors that once helped but now limit you)

Update just one of them: one boundary, one schedule shift, one conversation, one small change that supports the person you’re becoming.

Sometimes, momentum doesn’t start with doing more. It starts with removing what no longer fits.

And that’s it for this week. Thank you for being a part of the positive corner of the internet, and we hope you all have a fantastic weekend!

-Arnold, Adam, and Daniel

Better Today

Take any of these tips from today’s email and put them into action:

1. Losing 2-3% of Your Body Weight in the First Month Can Predict Long-Term Success

A 16-week study found that those who lost more than 2% of their body weight by week 4 were far more likely to achieve more long-term total weight loss. But it’s not all about speed. Long-term studies confirm that sustainable habits, not extreme diets, drive lasting results.

2. The Mental Shift That Improves Relationships, Decisions, and Self-Awareness

Judgment feels efficient, but it closes the door to growth, misreads intentions, and traps you in old stories. Try this simple 7-day curiosity practice: pause snap reactions to ask "What might I be missing?" Taking this approach can expand your world, ease your relationships, and break the assumptions that hold you back.

3. Why You Feel Stuck Even When Doing Everything Right: The Psychology of Identity Drift

Psychologists call it self-concordance: goals aligned with your evolving identity lead to greater persistence and lower burnout, while mismatched environments drain momentum, even when you're doing everything "right." If you feel stuck, examine four areas where identity drift hides: your commitments, environment, relationships, and routines. Then, update just one to match who you're becoming.

Publisher: Arnold Schwarzenegger

Editors-in-chief: Adam Bornstein and Daniel Ketchell


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