Should You Give Your Kids Tough Love?

Welcome to the positive corner of the internet. Every weekday, we make sense of the confusing world of wellness by analyzing the headlines, simplifying the latest research, and offering quick tips designed to make you healthier in less than 5 minutes. If you were forwarded this message, you can get the free daily email here.

Today’s Health Upgrade

• Monday motivation

• Should you give your kids tough love?

• Jumpstart your week

• Workout of the week

Arnold’s Corner
Monday Motivation 

On Saturday, I held my annual fundraiser for After-School All-Stars at my home.

It’s the only event I ever open up my house for, and it is a wonderful reminder of the good we can all do when we work together.

I spent the whole night looking around the party and just loving how many people showed up to support the 150,000 kids who attend After-School All-Stars programs all over the country.

My twin brother Danny DeVito was there supporting us, my whole FUBAR team was helping, my friend John Simonian, the watch king who runs Westime Luxury Watches and Jewelry, helped us make it the best fundraiser in the world once again. Every single year, he is my partner, and more friends and family than I could count showed up for our kids.

Wolfgang Puck made schnitzel and delicious Oktoberfest food.

We raised almost 7 million dollars. Think about that. In one night!

I want to thank every single person who was there to support us, and everyone who opened up their wallet for our kids, and I want all of you to be inspired by them.

I get a lot of emails from people who feel pessimistic. It isn’t my style, but I understand you. There is a lot of bad happening all over the world.

But if you’re willing to look around, there is much, much more good than bad. I saw it this weekend. I saw people who step up to keep kids healthy, safe, and learning during the danger zone hours of 3 to 6 pm — the hours when kids are most likely to end up committing juvenile crimes, doing drugs, or ending up with a teenage pregnancy. Things that will impact their lives forever. After-school programs protect the kids from the bad because they have adult supervision.

If you can’t find a way to see the good in the world, I have advice that will help you find some optimism.

Be like the people who showed up at my house this weekend. If you’re willing to volunteer or donate to a good cause, it is the quickest cure for pessimism. Studies show that people who donate are happier and less stressed.

I have a theory about why. Because I’ve lived it.

When you see something negative, it impacts you. At that point, you’ve got two choices: complain or do something.

We know complaining will make you less happy. And I don’t want that for you — the same studies show that pessimistic people don’t live as long as optimists. This is a health and fitness newsletter. We are trying to live long, happy lives.

The other option — doing something — immediately makes you feel less powerless. I know.

I got involved in after-school programs more than three decades ago. I traveled to every state to visit schools and promote fitness when I was the Chairman of the President’s Council on Physical Fitness, and I started to worry that no matter the state, I saw kids standing around with nowhere to go and no one to pick them up when the bell rang. I asked a principal and he explained that 70 percent of kids come from homes where the parents are working, and there just isn’t funding to give all the kids a program to keep them in school.

That pissed me off. But instead of complaining, I got to work.

In the past 32 years, we have raised 1.75 billion dollars. We have helped 2.5 million kids!

That’s power. You can’t help but feel optimistic when you realize the impact you can have. I could have complained and not changed anything. Instead, I flexed my power.

But I didn’t do it alone. I owe a thank you to our whole team.

I love meeting with Ben and Andrea and John Simonian and everyone involved in After-School All-Stars. Because when we get together, there isn’t a single pessimist in the room.

Because all of us have learned that we have the power to make an impact.

You have that power, too. No matter who you are. Whether it’s donating 10 dollars or volunteering to coach sports or tutor kids, the second you use your power, you will stop feeling the pull of pessimism.

You will see that you can change the world — and that will change your life, I promise.

Mental Health
Want To Raise Resilient Adults? Manage Tough Love With Your Kids

If you want to help your children, your decisions during difficult moments could shape how they deal with health challenges as adults.

New research suggests that empathizing with a child’s pain can help them become more resilient and better manage health issues as adults. 

Researchers assessed the multiple factors that go into a child’s experience when they deal with sickness and pain and how those experiences shape their reactions to health struggles in adulthood. While the research is based on associations (and not cause and effect), the scientists provide an interesting perspective on how emotional support impacts their pain perception and coping strategies.

The researchers found that children whose pain was validated reported lower pain intensity and showed fewer signs of anxiety compared to those whose pain was minimized or ignored. Validation helped children feel understood and supported, reducing the emotional distress associated with pain.

Children who received validation learned to develop positive coping mechanisms, such as verbalizing their pain constructively. This proactive coping helps prevent maladaptive responses, such as fear-avoidance behaviors (avoiding activities due to fear of pain), which are often linked to chronic pain development.

On the other hand, children who experienced invalidating responses, such as having their pain dismissed or being told to “toughen up,” were more likely to develop persistent pain. 

Maybe most importantly, the researchers suggest that these experiences shape development and how children learn to manage, cope with, and treat pain and health issues later in life. 

The scientists suggest that building resilience is as simple as listening to children, validating their feelings, and making sure that they feel heard and understood. 

Jumpstart Your Week

The Supplement Swindle 

We might sound like a broken record, but that’s because we hate seeing people waste their money and resources on ineffective solutions. 

If you buy a supplement, look for either the NSF Certified For Sport or Informed Sport label on a brand — it’s the difference between knowing what’s in a product or taking a mystery product. 

Researchers purchased and reviewed 30 popular products on Amazon and found that nearly 60 percent had inaccurate labels, 13 were misbranded, and 9 had hidden ingredients you probably don’t want in your body.

That’s why we recommend Momentous. Their products are all third-party certified and undergo the strictest protocols because professional athletes, Olympians, and the military use them. 

We’re not saying you should avoid supplements; we’re just saying to avoid supplement companies that don’t invest in guaranteeing quality and safety. 

As a member of the positive corner of the internet, all members of Arnold’s Pump Club get 20% OFF their order at Momentous when using the code “PUMPCLUB” at checkout.

The Sleep Smoothie

The post-workout protein shake is one of the most popular ways to recover from a workout. But it might be time to take the same approach before you sleep. 

A review of 35 studies found that combining protein and carbs a few hours before bed can improve sleep quality and overall rest. 

Protein that’s high in tryptophan (an amino acid) appears to do the trick, meaning you can go for a whey-based smoothie or eat foods that are higher in tryptophan, such as milk, eggs, fish, chickpeas, or even almonds. For the carbs, choose fruit, oats, potatoes, white rice, or honey. 

And before you assume it won’t make a difference, the researchers found that the protein and carb combination was more effective than popular sleep aids such as beetroot or cherry juice. 

Fitness
Workout Of The Week

We repeatedly recommend finding ways to push the intensity of your workout because research suggests it’s a much better way to ensure your efforts lead to results you can feel and see. 

But sometimes, your fear of injury can play mind games and make it harder to push your body to the limit. 

That’s where “self-limiting” exercises can be helpful. Some movements are safer by design because you can do the exercise — or you can’t, meaning it’s harder to get hurt. These exercises can help you maximize intensity while minimizing risk. 

The workout primarily consists of self-limiting movements, and focus on making the most of every set and challenging yourself to become better. 

How to do it: Perform this workout as a circuit, meaning you’ll do one exercise after another, resting as little as possible between exercises. After you complete all the movements, rest for 3 minutes and repeat another 2 to 4 times.

1A. Farmer’s walk (use a dumbbell, kettlebell, or rucksack): Walk for 30 seconds

1B. Lunge iso hold (right leg forward): Hold the lower position of a lunge for 10 seconds

1C. Lunge (right leg forward): 10 reps

1D. Lunge iso hold (left leg forward): Hold the lower position of a lunge for 10 seconds

1E. Lunge (left leg forward): 10 reps

1F. Pushup iso hold: Lower your body and stay in the bottom position of a pushup for 10 seconds

1G. Pushups: AMAP (as many reps as possible)

1H. Inverted row iso hold: Pull your body up and hold the top position of an inverted row for 10 seconds

1I. Inverted row: AMAP (as many reps as possible)

1J. Squats: 10-20 reps (bodyweight, dumbbell, kettlebell, or wearing a rucksack)

1K. Plank: 30 seconds

Give it a try, and let us know what you think. Here’s to a great week ahead!

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Publisher: Arnold Schwarzenegger​

Editors-in-chief: Adam Bornstein and Daniel Ketchell